Back in business and ain't it grand? Let the good times roll...

So for the two people who read my blog, you probably noticed I have been quiet for the last week and a half or so, and boy do I have a lot to catch up on! I am writing to you today from my new room in my new sober living. Here is what happened, on Sunday the 16th I made my return to the DJ booth at my own party, Betty Ford Lounge; and it was a bust. Usually we have a crowd of about 150 to 200 people, but this time we had about 40 or so people in attendance. I of course took it personally, blaming myself for it thinking to myself things like “nobody likes you” and “nobody respects you”and “you are a horrible DJ you don't deserve success” so I did, what I rarely do, which is I drank alcoholically. Normally, I drink a couple of drinks to be social and that is it, but after having what I thought was a disastrous afternoon I wanted to drink my troubles away (I hadn't done this for 3 years now, when my best friend died of heart failure) so off I went to the Faultline (one of our local leather bars) and proceeded to drink shot after shot after shot to forget what I was feeling. I had also had a huge blowout with the asshole that was my house parent the day before, and we had gotten our internet taken away from us, so I was SO fucking tired of living at my sober living. So I came home, and I was surprisingly not SUPER drunk, to the degree that I could've just walked into my room, gone to sleep and no one would have been the wiser. My therapist thinks that I subconsciously wanted to get kicked out, and so I then proceeded to talk to half of my housemates, now I am a pretty good actor, but not enough to hide the smell of tequila. I fessed up to my drinking, and proceeded to spend the night at motel to sleep it off.

Next day, my wish is granted and I am kicked out of my sober living, I had obviously not though this through because I instantly became homeless. The first half of the day became a bit scary for me as no one was able to offer me a couch commitment, it wasn't till around 6 or 7 that my dear friend and former housemate Juan said that I could not only spend the night, but could stay with him till a bed opened up at another sober living, which is where I have been for the last week and a half. Today I took the day off from school and proceeded to move into my new sober living, which is AMAZING. I get my own room in the back of the house, I will have a dish network connection in my room, I have internet as you can see, and most importantly I get to keep my kitty with me. People still ask me to this day, why I don't think I am an alcoholic? I tell them this, I can put down a margarita down quite easily, I can NOT put down a needle filled with meth once I have picked it up, at least not till my life doesn't get turned upside down first. Will I ever turn into an alcoholic? Possibly, but not today. I will not be drinking again till I move out of this sober living, which won't be till January or February of next year when I am close to graduation from school.

I am days away from my one year anniversary off meth, which is a big deal for me, my mom and sister are coming into town tomorrow and we are spending a great weekend together enjoying each others company, they will see the man I have become and I hope that I will make them proud. For now I will just get into my jammies and get to bed so that I may wake up early enough for school, and be grateful for the bed and roof I have over me today.

NO, MORE, DRAMA!

So as I said a couple of days ago, there are plenty of things going on in my life that I have to blog about. For one, the drama is non stop at my sober living, the most annoying one is the fact that we sprayed the house for bed bugs, yet again (this is my FIFTH spraying) and we may have another one next Monday, AGAIN, making that number six! I have had ENOUGH of this hell hole, but it's gonna be hard convincing my parents that I am ready to be out of this place, since they worry about my safety. I understand them totally, but I feel like I have proven myself with going to school, and being of service, and now with this new job I feel like I am definitely working a lot harder than I ever have before.

On the drama side of things, I had quite the little incident this last weekend. I was sitting at home, watching TV as usual, and all of a sudden I see one of the rehab employees walk out of his room with a plastic bag that made a clink clink clink kind of sound that somehow rang a bell with me...so as I watched TV, I kept an eye on him through the corner of my eye and watched him as he threw the bag away...in our neighbors trash cans. This made me think, I sat there having the most Murder She Wrote-y inner monologue going on in my head, thinking to myself things like “oh, I bet she's throwing away those liquor bottles she's been drinking in our sober living” and “wouldn't it just be so fucking funny and hypocritical for one of the people that lectured me on my drinking a couple of weeks ago, to have been drinking in the house this whole time?”. So I watched him get ready, and get in his car...and as soon as I was sure he was gone, I Scooby Doo'd my ass over to our neighbor's garbage cans, and pulled out the bag he threw away there...and lo and behold, there they were four empty flasks of vodka! The mystery of the hypocritical alcoholic had been solved! I must admit there was this little part of me (OK big part of me) that really enjoyed catching this bit of hypocrisy right under my own roof. So I did what I was supposed to do, I told the higher ups about what I found, and they apparently called him. He denied it, and when he came home, he sat right next to me and denied it as well, saying “it's not what it looks like”...and I said “it looks like you've been drinking INSIDE a sober living”, and he said no...to which I responded “then why does your breath still smell like liquor?”, to which he responded “I don't have answer for that”...check, and mate! Needles to say he hasn't set foot back in this house, or the office since, who knows where he is? I hope he is somewhere safe, getting help for his problem. Me? I am just hoping and praying that I can convince my family that I am a trust worthy man, that is totally dedicated to his new life free of drugs, and full of devotion to my new passion of haircutting.

Smoke! Smoke! Sign of the devil!Sign of the devil!City on fire!

Well sober living on fire to be exact, so I have been quiet for the last couple of days because my sober living was set on fire for the second time on Wednesday, well Thursday morning to be exact, at 3. And to top it all off we had to be up early the next day to have an 9am meeting to get ready to pack the house and move out for two days while they did yet another bed bug fumigation and they also had to shellac the whole place to make sure no bed bugs creep out of the floor like they were in Michael Jackson's Thriller video. So I spent the last couple of nights at my friend Tim's apartment...anyway it has been a very stressful couple of days, and to top THAT all of, we have been working so hard in school that they are moving our testing week up, and this coming week is our week of finals before we go onto the floor and take costumers. I am excited but scared as all hell, so any waking moment that I have free I will spend studying. Anyway I am tired as all hell, and I have to get ready for rehearsal!

Anyway my song for today, is my anthem I think, and it is by one of my favorite artists in the world...here you go with Robbie Williams: Come Undone!